How are you going to do your holiday?

Introduction

Are you heading for holiday heaven or holiday hell? Find out in our quiz…

1. On the beach you drink…

a) The entire contents of the cocktail list.

b) Plenty of water to stay hydrated between beers, if you choose to drink.

c) A flask of tea which you brought with you.

2. You’re lounging by the pool in the blazing midday sun. What are you wearing?

a) As little as possible. The lobster look is in this season.

b) A high-factor sun cream and a hat to keep the sun off.

c) Go out in the midday sun? Don’t be ridiculous!

3. You’re heading for a night on the town. What are you planning to eat?

a) A kebab on the way home, if they do kebabs in Turkey.

b) A meal in a restaurant. Eating out’s part of the fun, and it’ll help absorb the alcohol if you drink.

c) The fish fingers you brought with you from the UK – you can’t trust that foreign stuff.

4. One of your mates has had a lot to drink and has just been sick. What do you do?

a) Buy him a pint to take the taste away.

b) Take him back to the hotel and stay with him till he starts to sober up.

c) Stay away – he’s probably caught cholera.

5. You’re dancing in a club and someone dares your friend to take her bikini top off. What do you do?

a) Get out your camera phone, ready to upload the photos to Facebook.

b) Have a quiet word – remind her not to do anything she might regret.

c) Pretend she’s nothing to do with you.

6. Some drunken lads try to start a fight with you and your mates. What do you say?

a) “You wanna **** start something, you **** ****? **** come outside if you **** think you’re **** hard enough.”

b) “Come on, forget it. Let’s go somewhere else.”

c) “Steady on chaps, we Brits should stick together.”

7. You’ve woken up with a hangover. What do you do?

a) Head for the bar for a hair of the dog.

b) Stay on the fruit juice – your body needs time to recover.

c) Panic that you’ve caught a fatal tropical disease.

How did you score?

Mostly a): You’re determined to have a good time but your holiday could turn hellish. If you’re lucky, you’ll end up with heatstroke and embarrassing holiday snaps. But you could find yourself in a foreign hospital or police cell, or bringing home an STD as a souvenir.

Mostly b): You’re on your way to a heavenly holiday. You’re a good person to be around – your friends are lucky to have you.

Mostly c): You don’t really want to go abroad at all, do you? Apparently Skegness is very bracing at this time of year – if you can find anyone who’ll go with you.